The semester isn’t even in full swing, yet I already find myself struggling to meet deadlines. How did this happen, you may wonder. Well, through a domino effect basically – you let one thing slip and you’re suddenly behind with everything. How do I deal with it? I don’t – I commence my procrastination routine and hope for the best, preferably a sudden and irresistible urge to get over myself and do some work.
I remember that when I first learned the word procrastination in English, I couldn’t quite grasp the concept. I figured that maybe there is no equivalent for it in Polish because this phenomenon simply doesn’t afflict our hard-working nation. But of course it does, and if the forever disputed human nature exists, procrastination is how it universally manifests itself. We don’t have a word for it just because we’re not jaded enough to acknowledge its existence, and not creative enough to make it into almost an art form, as, I recently discovered, Americans have.
During my last time-wasting session I spent a bulk of the time on Facebook – the ultimate procrastination venue. It didn’t take me long to find a group called “I double major in Napping and Facebook, with a minor in Procrastination”, and realize how much I belong. It felt so good and cozy to suddenly be among my own people – those proud slackers, who wake up at midday, and work their hands bloody punching that remote or keyboard. No laborious workaholics who submit their work on time and push the world forward, who go to sleep when you’re just about to finally open your textbook, and get up as you start to realize that your reading speed has decreased to one page per coffee mug, and you’ve already had four of those.
But then, out of nowhere, remorse came. The sense of belonging to a virtual community of fellow procrastinators gave way to fear. What if I hang around here long enough to actually begin to consider this destructive habit something to pride myself on and celebrate? After all, it’s common knowledge that nothing is a better excuse than knowing that others do that same, shameful thing too. I started biting my nails and imagining my future as a college dropout, earning a living by sitting on the sidewalk with a “Tell me off for $5” sign donning my chest.
The curious thing is that having this apocalyptic vision never even stopped me from browsing the image gallery of the Facebook group. What I found in that gallery was an impressive array of funny slogans, cartoons and, what cracked me up the most, a “Procrastination Loop” flipchart, illustrating how the activity begins, progresses and eventually ends. Or becomes a vicious circle, for that matter. As I laughed and admired the author’s ingeniousness, I felt a sudden surge of creative energy myself and vented it by creating my very own Facebook group (of the classic “You know you’re from X when…” type). And that’s when I had the real epiphany.
That undoubtedly remarkable achievement made me rediscover that residue of creative energy hidden somewhere deep within, that I just had to find the right outlet for. When people started signing up for the group and expressing their appreciation, it dawned on that I created something of value for society, to use a pompous word, and somehow contributed to public discourse. And so have all the other people who left their footmark somewhere on Facebook, on the Internet or elsewhere. The fruits of procrastination can be valuable in themselves and so I say, “procrastinators of the world – unite!” After all, they say we are the leaders of the future.